May 2010

May 3rd:  Lately I have been just doing track and School and the rest of the time I am with Chris. I am having tons of fun right now. I can't believe how much has happened and how fun Track is. I have a meet tomorrow which I am pretty sure that Chris is going. That makes me happy. We have done so much
together lately, mainly playing sports. However, on Sunday I went with him to his cousins. They weren't expecting me but it was fun. His Sister,  Amber, was there and she was different this time. The first time she like avoided me, this time I kept catching her look at me and would smile when I would say something. She is very mellow and isn't like most people where they usually ask a person a lot of question to make them feel more comfortable.  After I asked Chris what she thinks about me and he didn't know, but apparently later that night she called him and she told him that she likes me the most out of all the other girls he has dated. She said that I am fun and not shy and that she can tell that he is comfortable and himself around me. Chris told me that he does feel comfortable around me and that he always has. So that was a really good day. Last night we went on a walk and we talked about everything. We even talked
about marriage in general, which I wish we wouldn't have. But he told me that he really likes me and has thought about saying the "L" word. Makes me wonder if and when he will say it. Aww, I like him a lot!! I could see us getting married, but I know that we need to wait and be patient. This Friday I will hopefully have a girls night while Chris goes with  Drew to their grandmas, Saturday a date and then go home for Mother's Day. I love my mom so much.

May 20th: So much has happened and it has been hard to find time to write in my journal. The weekend that I went home for mother's Day, Chris ended up going down with me. It was a lot of fun. We went out to Jenell's house on Saturday and spent the day out there. We herded cattle, which I really enjoy and Chris did too. He's not a cowboy by all means but he sure loves it and could in time be my cowboy. Later we went out to the lava beds and caves. That was fun I was glad Jenell and Owen got to know Chris better. We spent the night there, which I got to talk to my mom a lot. I even cried to her ... I just love her so much. I have been blessed with wonderful parents. 

This last weekend I went to New Mexico for conference championships for track. I had So much fun! I didn't do good at all, but have definitely have learned a lot. I am just so grateful to be on this team, with wonderful friends and teammates, and Great coaches who care. Even though I didn't do well, which I threw like 125' and was so upset afterwards, I was so grateful my parents went to support me! They are amazing. I still get to keep my Scholarship for next year and I get to go to Jr. Nationals at the end of June. I did place 7Th however, which is really good for a freshman. I know I can and will get better. I had fun playing Toothpick at the pool with the guys that night. Good experience and best meet that I have ever been to.  And we won the Mountain West Conference! I was gone Thursday until Sunday, I could not wait to see Chris, I missed that Man. 

Quote from dad's Journal: "We went to Albuquerque to Amber’s track meet.  We stopped over night at the Indian ruins in Colorado, which was very interesting for mom and I.  I had two tire blow outs on the motor home.  Kind of scary, but still a great trip.  Amber was still trying to get back to her true form, and even tho she placed 5th, she was very disappointed and frustrated.  BYU coach invited mom and I to their banquet that evening, and they told Amber they know she is going to be a great one, so they are going to renew her scholarship for next year, and sponsored her at the Junior Nationals in DeMoines the 26th of this month.  That picked her spirits back up.  Smart move on the coaches part.  She is already throwing above 140’ again, so we are all excited to go to DeMoines, Iowa."

When I got back Chris came to see me, I felt like a giddy school girl when I saw him. I ran and gave him a hug. I didn't make it to Regionals but instead Chris invited me to go home with him to Colorado next week. I am Super nervous. I am meeting his parents for the first time and he has never brought a girl home before. I am way excited though, it is just the next step towards "M" that makes me a little nervous. But ya know, I am really not that scared about marriage anymore. I definitely could see myself marrying Chris and would want to. He has never told me that he loves me yet, but one time he kind of said it, but also mumbled it at the same time. He has also dropped a few hints to words marriage. Like one time he said he could get used to going to my house to see "his" nieces. I was dumbfounded, speechless. He is a good guy. He made me feel so good when he made and brought banana bread to me. I think my mom is afraid that I am going to get married, she approves just doesn't want to lose her baby. Marla definitely approves. She says that she sees nothing wrong with him. I agree, I haven't found one bad thing .. . I am glad! Track was good today for once. I threw about 138' ! Made me feel a whole lot better about myself. Javelin is such a mental sport. Tomorrow I am going to do home work and hopefully get ahead in my class. Then Chris is going to meet me at 2:30 to film me throw the javelin to work on my technique. Afterwards we will both go weight lift, then get ready and go on a date to the movie! I am excited! I Really enjoy being with him. 

May 22nd: Yesterday was a really good day. I got up and did homework. I got caught up in one class and a week ahead in the other. At 2:30 I met Chris at the track and he watch me and help me with my technique. He caught on quick on what to look for and how it needed to be. I was really glad he came and that he cares. Afterwards we both went our different ways to weightlifting and right when I got done I booked it home to take a shower and get ready for our date. He came at 5:20, which only left me a half hour to take a shower and everything. Our date was really fun! We went to the movie theatre and watched the new Robin Hood movie, it was good. After, we went to Costa Vida and took it to go. We got some blankets and went to the park to eat it. I really liked this, it was cute and romantic, but yet we are both silly. We pretended like we were royalty, and wrestled ... Kissed! He said that he "might  Love" me. I asked, "Might?" He said , "with all my might.  haha I told him that he is a chicken butt. We both had lots of fun. We then went back to his apartment and joined his other roommates and watched another movie. Today has been good too. I have slept in until 10, then got ready for the day with homework and cleaning. Now I am already for Chris to come and get me. We are doubling with Drew and Hayley (who is in my ASL class, that I got him to ask) We are going in the canyon for a dutch oven dinner. I am excited. Chris and Drew are so much fun to be with. Not only is he my boy friend but he is my best friend.

May 23rd: Awww!! ! I am So Happy. .. Chris and I said I Love You" to each other!!! I'll tell you more tomorrow, the whole story ! I am So happy and have butterflies like none other! He told me that he has never felt this way about someone before... and neither have!!

May 24th: So yesterday we all went to Jamie Whittier's house for dinner. It was a lot of fun. After dinner we played some games. Jamie is so funny, she kept asking us random questions about me and Chris, like if we have said "I love you" yet, how many kids I want? Oh which by the way I told her six and I later found out that is how many Chris wants too and when she asked me, Chris told me that he felt like it was towards us both and that he would just let me answer. On the way home Chris and I were alone just talking about the things Jamie asked. We got to a point where we were asking pretty serious questions. We asked each other what we thought love meant and how we feel if the other person was to say it. I told him that I feel like Love means that he really really does care for me and that it is a serious thing and has the definite potential to marriage. At that point, I knew that Chris loves me, I just felt that he was scared to say it and needed a little help. So I said that I have a deep question and told him that he probably doesn't want me to ask. He knew exactly what I was going to ask. He told me to ask and that he really wanted me to ask. So I did, I asked, "Do you love me?" He told me, with a quick response, a definite "Yes"" I was quiet, but on the inside I was freaking out! I was so giddy and excited, I had butterflies like none other. It felt so good and Right! I ended up saying, "good, I love you too."  After a minute or so of silence and after we got to the top of the mountain and stopped, he turned to look at me and said, "Amber, I Love You!" I said again, "I love you too" and then kissed. We talked for so long. We talked about marriage too. I asked him where he thought our relationship was headed, and he told me that he has thought about us getting married and that he could see it happening. He then asked me and I told him that of course I have thought about marriage, especially since that is what dating is for and since we have been dating for like 5 months. We talked a lot of the different ways we thought and then he told me that when we were at my home for mother's Day talking on the tramp, I mentioned how I thought my family have health problem and that I hope that I have my family before they die. He told me that when I said that, he had this craziest feeling

that he could help with that. It just felt so good to hear that. He told me that he has never felt this way before and has never even told a girl, besides family that he loves her. Also that he has never wanted to tell a girl that he loves her as badly as he wanted to tell me! He told me that he has spent 4-6 hours on the computer the other day researching Javelin and the technique, so if I needed he could help me. I really appreciated that so much. I have never felt like this before, I really do Love him!

May 27th: Throwers party!